Teacher : Is there anything you can do better than anyone else?
Student : Yes teacher, read my own handwriting
Boy : Step up right, folks and see the white hen lay brown eggs.
Samy : What is so marvelous about that?
Boy : Well, can you do it?
John : how many is five Q and five Q?
Anne : Ten Qs.
John : You are welcome.
Teacher : Tell me the truth now, who did your homework?
Student : Dad
Teacher : All alone?
Student : No, I help him with it.
Boss (angrily) : You should have been here at 7.30 am!
Worker : Why? What happened?
Teacher : Why are you late, Elmo?
Elmo : Well, the sign on the road said.......
Teacher : Now, what can a sign possibly have to do with this?
Elmo : The sign says, "school ahead, go slow"
Lecture : Why is it, Mark, that everyone else had a five page report on milk and your composition is only half a page
Student : I was writing about condensed milk
Mr John : James, name two pronouns.
James : Who, me?
Mr John : That's correct.
Lady to a policeman, (standing in the middle of the street) "Can you tell me how to get to the hospital?" The policeman said, " Just stand where you are now".
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